


War and Peace: Your love gives me strength

by thunderingskies



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - War, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Drabble Collection, Eventual Happy Ending, Falling In Love, Getting to Know Each Other, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Smoking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-04
Updated: 2017-10-03
Packaged: 2018-11-09 01:43:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11094288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderingskies/pseuds/thunderingskies
Summary: Amidst the war, the crisis and the fear, not all is lost when two young men find each other. In the midst of despair and destruction young love can bloom, but can it grow and survive?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This AU is a joint effort between myself and [Amalas](http://amalasdraws.tumblr.com/)! It will be explored mainly through drabbles here (maybe a full fic in the future) and her art!
> 
> Check out some of her sketches [here](http://amalasdraws.tumblr.com/post/161297877123/and-then-there-is-this-war-au-no-one-asked-forbut)!

He’s not quite sure when the sleepless nights started.

It sure wasn’t an immediate thing.

He remembers first getting drafted, shipping out; basic training, his first assignments. Slept like a rock through it all.

But somewhere down the road, things changed.

Curling up on his cot provides him with nothing more than the crushing silence and the heavy weight of his own thoughts that he tries so  _ so _ hard to ignore, but...

Hajime sighs.

He’s getting nowhere with this tonight.

He shifts, climbing out of his cot, ignoring the throb of weary muscles, of his damp clothes that never seem to dry, the gnawing anxiety biting away at him-

Okay, so he’s  _ trying _ to ignore it all. But it’s hard. 

He steps into his shoes, slipping out of the building, careful not to wake up anyone who’s been able to actually fall asleep.

Fresh air helps, sometimes. 

It’s cold and dark outside, the night air biting at his exposed skin. The only light is coming from the low-hanging moon and the fire pit a way’s away.

He buttons up the rest of his coat.

Cold.

He’s alone.

_ Fuck. _

Maybe a smoke will help. 

He wasn’t much of a smoker before, but, well - this changes people.

War.

He takes a small path away from the building, getting enough distance between him and the guys, wanting to be away from them even though he hates this feeling of being alone.

Hajime walks until he finds a good spot to sit, dropping himself down in the dirt where he can lean back against one of the abandoned buildings. He’s long since cared about getting his clothes dirty - he’s much more concerned with getting them wet, but he can’t always help it. It hasn’t rained since yesterday, when the entire unit got drenched in a downpour that felt like it came out of nowhere.

He reaches into his shirt pocket, pulling out his pack of smokes. He tips one out, running his fingers along the length of it -

Ah, shit.

It’s damp.

He’d been hoping they’d been spared from the rain, but no such luck.

What’s luck anymore anyway, these days?

He kicks some rocks with his foot before the sound of approaching footsteps catches his attention.

He’s so much more aware of his surroundings now.

He recognizes the sound of the boots, the tread they make - he knows it’s one of the guys - but he looks anyway, of course, out of habit.

He’s a bit surprised at who he finds.

Oikawa walks towards him, nodding in greeting. He must be awake, too; he’s not on guard duty tonight. Iwaizumi looks at him briefly, nodding, before looking back down at his cigarette. It’s useless, now, so he crumbles it between his fingers, letting the pieces fall to the ground and get swept up by the wind. 

He sighs, turning when Oikawa approaches him, holding out a pack of cigarettes.

“Want one?”

Oikawa’s been in his unit ever since they deployed, and he’s still not sure how he feels about him. He seems too… showy, for this kind of thing. Too flashy. He smiles too easily and laughs too loudly. Hajime’s never sure if he’s taking all of this seriously, and it rubs him the wrong way.

But who is he to pass up a free smoke?

“Yeah,” Iwaizumi replies with a nod. “Thanks.” He sticks his hand out to accept it, but rather than just pass him a smoke Oikawa plops down next to him. He tips his pack, pulling out two cigarettes. He passes one to Hajime; his fingers are cold to the touch. He pulls a lighter out of his jacket pocket, offering it to Hajime.

Hajime frowns. They’re not friends, he hardly even knows this guy - why’s he even hanging around?

But he did give him a smoke… so who’s he to tell him he can’t sit?

The first drag always hits the hardest, Hajime finds, once he has his lit and between his lips. He inhales nice and slowly, wanting to appreciate it for as long as he can. He nods his thanks to Oikawa, who lights up his own cigarette moments later, the light from the flame illuminating his face, revealing how weary and tired he looks.

In a moment, the light dissipates and it’s hidden again.

Hajime swallows.

Silence envelops them. Hajime leans his head back against the building behind them, looking up at the sky above them.

It’s clear, and filled with stars.

It’s beautiful.

So ironic.

He lets the cool air and the cigarette calm him down, take the edge off his nerves. He takes in another deep breath, some of the tension leaving his body with the exhale. He listens to Oikawa’s breathing, regular and steady, and it’s… sort of nice.

To not be alone.

It’s Oikawa who breaks the silence, clearing his throat and leaning a little closer. “You know, they dry faster if you put newspaper in them.” He looks up to meet Hajime’s confused gaze, and points down to his feet. “Your boots, I mean… they dry better that way. Can’t really dry them properly out here…”

_ Oh. _

Hajime blinks, still not really sure  _ why _ they’re talking, but he nods anyway. “Oh… yeah, thanks. I feel like I’ve been walking around in puddles for days now…”

Oikawa laughs, low and easily. “It won’t dry them completely… but it sure helps.”

“Thanks man,” Hajime says, looking over at Oikawa, who takes another drag from his cigarette. He nods a few times before looking down at his feet, and, well.

It won’t kill him to be nice.

So he starts, “Man… even my cigarettes are damp. What weather… isn’t it supposed to be summer?” 

“Right? I thought so too. Nobody told me it was flood season.” Oikawa snorts in laughter, shaking his head. “Should have brought some more socks.”

“Oh yeah,” Hajime agrees, “I try to make mine last as long as possible but it feels like I’m going through them so fast!”

Oikawa makes a face. “Me too… and I lost a pair in a game of poker the other day… so now I’m down even more…”

“Really?” Hajime laughs, “Who took it from you? The lieutenant?” 

Oikawa nods his confirmation. “I swear he cheats!”

“Nah, doesn’t cheat. Everyone just lets him win because he gets really pissy and assigns shit duties when he loses.” Hajime shrugs, and Oikawa looks at him, shocked.

“What an asshole! I’m not sorry anymore that he got all those bug bites. He can forget me covering for some of his duties again.” Oikawa huffs, looking fake offended, trying his hardest to not break into a laugh.

“Well, at least this camp isn’t as bad as the last one. We’ve got some shelter from the rain, and the wind.” Oikawa taps his cigarette between two fingers, a few ashes falling down to the ground. “I was  _ sure _ that I was gonna claw out my own hair if I had to stay at our last camp any longer.”

“What, you didn’t like how the wind made it rain sideways? Right into the tents, whenever we had to open them?” He shakes his head and laughs. “I mean, I sure as shit loved waking up in the middle of the night to piss and having to deal with that.”

“Oh,  _ yes. _ I also  _ loved _ listening to the snoring from the guys. Honestly, I don’t know how they get to sleep so easily,” Oikawa replies, smirking.

It takes off from there, really. Oikawa’s good at keeping up conversation - he meets all of Hajime’s comments with one of his own, jumps off his jokes, keeps up with his banter. It’s nice, easy.  _ Fun _ , even though i feels strange to use that word, with everything going on around them. What was he so worried about with this guy, anyway?

When he hears Oikawa yawn for the fourth time - and he’s yawning into his hand for the second time, too, Hajime realizes how late it’s gotten. He looks up at the sky, knowing that they need to get some rest if they’re going to make it through another long day.

Oikawa laughs through his yawn, shaking his head. He looks up at the sky, following Hajime’s lead, enjoying the last bit of stars that they get to see. 

They really are beautiful.

Maybe it’s alright to enjoy them like this, for what they are.

A few more moments pass before Hajime takes in a deep breath, stretching his arms high above his head. “We should probably get some rest, Oikawa. Especially if we’re going to be trudging through some more swamps today.”

Oikawa nods, throwing Hajime a grin. “You’re right. Oh - don’t forget the newspaper trick, alright, Iwaizumi? Life saver. I promise.”

They stand and Hajime agrees, digging his hands into his pockets. “I’ll be sure to try it out.”

The walk back to their camp is a bit easier; a bit lighter. Hajime nods a goodbye, heading back to his cot, lying out flat on his back. He doesn’t quite feel so… weighed down, anymore. He closes his eyes, curling up on his side, and taking a long deep breath.

This time, sleep finds him; calm and restful, and he wakes up in the morning able to shake off some of his weariness, some of that weight.

And the newspaper trick? It really does help.

So does Oikawa’s company.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tooru’s so close.
> 
> He’s so close that Hajime can feel his warm breaths against his face, tickling his neck. Hajime shifts, Tooru’s arm sliding further down his side, fingertips resting on his lower back, warm and light even through the heavy fabric of his jacket.
> 
> Hajime swallows, eyes sweeping across Tooru’s face as they look at each other. Really look.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one jumps ahead a bit in the timeline - it is a few weeks/months later, after the boys have had some time to bond and become friends. <3

Tooru’s  _ so _ close.

He’s so close that Hajime can feel his warm breaths against his face, tickling his neck. Hajime shifts, Tooru’s arm sliding further down his side, fingertips resting on his lower back, warm and light even through the heavy fabric of his jacket.

Hajime swallows, eyes sweeping across Tooru’s face as they look at each other. _ Really _ look.

He’s never really looked at him this closely before… 

Tooru’s eyes are dark and captivating, a shade of brown that reminds Hajime of a hot, rich cup of coffee. He has a tiny scar across the bridge of his nose and Hajime wants to ask him how he got it, find out more about him - everything and anything that Tooru will divulge - but when he tries to speak his words get lost somewhere in his throat, all mixed-up and jumbled as Tooru brushes their noses together softly.

The war feels far away when it’s just the two of them here, tangled up together, breathless from their laughter, warm and comfortable for the first time in weeks. They’re finally out of the cold, away from the long, hot days and the damp nights; finally tucked away and sheltered for the night and able to  _ not _ worry so much about what’s going on beyond them. It feels like ages since he’s been comfortable like this, and he knows it isn’t just because he’s in dry clothes.

Hajime moves his hands up to Tooru’s shoulders, tightening his hold, more relaxed in cuddling him in now than he was before. They’ve done this a few times, now; gotten close and cuddled. What started as a need for comfort when things got dark has turned into so much more. 

Hajime doesn’t really know what to call it, but that’s the beauty of this, isn’t it? He doesn’t have to name it. They don’t need anything other than this moment, other than each other. Neither of them expect anything when tomorrow isn’t even a guarantee.

But those thoughts are far away with a warm Tooru in his arms, the tension he usually carries completely gone from his face.

Instead, he looks a little...shy. 

Tooru tugs himself closer, leaning in slightly, and Hajime meets his hesitant gaze.

“Have you...” Tooru hesitates, glancing down briefly before meeting his eye again, “have you ever kissed a man?” His voice is quiet and nervous but he doesn’t look away.

Hajime swallows, the question catching him off guard.

He doesn’t respond right away, instead looking down, watching the spot where he’s rubbing careful circles on Tooru’s shoulder. The material of Tooru’s jacket is rough, and Hajime can’t help but wonder what it would feel like to be touching his skin directly.

“No…” Hajime shakes his head, shifting a little, nervously. “I haven’t.” He keeps his thumb moving in continuous circles, the touches calming. Grounding. “Have you?”

Tooru smiles shyly and nods his head, keeping his eyes on Hajime. “Yes… I have.”

He’d had his suspicious, sure, but hearing Tooru say it so plainly has Hajime’s stomach flipping with nervous energy. He looks down at Tooru’s lips and wonders what it would feel like to kiss him.

What does he taste like?

Tooru bites his lip and Hajime mimics the movement without even realizing. He keeps his thumb moving slowly, eyes flicking up and down, conflicted. So many feelings are churning around inside of him, but there’s one question that keeps repeating over, and over, and  _ over- _

“What… does it feel like?” He asks, his curiosity finally getting the best of him.

Tooru smiles, perking up at the question. “What does it feel like… to kiss a man?” He asks, sliding his hands up Hajime’s back, leaving goosebumps in his wake. Hajime shivers.

Hajime bites down harder on his lip, still entranced with Tooru’s mouth. He can’t tear his gaze away, and leans in a little bit closer unintentionally. “Yeah…”

Tooru nudges him carefully with his nose, fingers curling in the fabric of Hajime’s shirt. Their faces are inches from each other, now, breaths mingling up.

“You wanna find out?”

Hajime takes in a deep breath.

Does he want to find out?

Does he want to kiss Tooru?

Hajime’s heart’s in his throat but there’s only one thing he can say, one answer that he wants to give, it’s banging around in his head just begging to get out-

“Yes,” he whispers at last, almost desperate yet also almost afraid. He’s out of his depth here, his stomach in knots as his shoulders tense and his fingers twitch, not sure how to move forward from here but knowing that he wants to. He  _ really _ wants to. 

Tooru smiles, brushing their noses together again, his lips curling into a smile. “Relax, Hajme,” he says, hugging him tighter, “and let me show you.” 

Hajime takes in a slow breath, following Tooru’s example. His eyes flick from Tooru’s mouth back up to meet his gaze. His heart’s beating so fast he’s sure that Tooru must be able to feel it through his chest. 

“Close your eyes,” Tooru says, quietly, slowly. Hajime’s nervous, but he knows Tooru will take care of him.

So he closes his eyes, and trusts.

He feels Tooru’s breath fan across his face and he tightens his grip on Tooru’s shoulders as their lips brush together, slow at first. Softly.

Kissing Tooru isn’t like any other kiss Hajime’s had before.

Tooru tastes of cigarette smoke and of the remnants of the hearty, rich stew they’d eaten for dinner. He certainly isn’t chaste, and waiting for Hajime to lead, like the few girls Hajime kissed in his youth - Tooru kisses him with purpose, with confidence; it fills him with an indescribable warmth that radiates through him, right down to the tips of his toes.

The first kiss is soft and gentle, and Hajime breaks the kiss after a few moments, his head spinning. He opens his eyes to look at Tooru, who looks as breathless as he feels; it’s comforting, in a way, to know that Tooru is feeling just as much as he is. Hajime laughs softly, grinning at Tooru’s smile, before leaning in to claim his second kiss. 

This time, Hajime loses track of how long they’re pressed together. Tooru threads his fingers through Hajime’s messy hair; Hajime rests his hands on Tooru’s lower back, pushing up the hem of his jacket and shirt just enough to touch his fingertips to Tooru’s bare skin, revelling in how nice that feels. Tooru leads him, pressing everything into the kiss - so many feelings that Hajime can’t even begin to name.

They finally break apart and Hajime’s overwhelmed, almost bleary; but Tooru brings him back, nuzzling his face and letting out a small laugh. 

“So how did that feel?” He asks, offering Hajime an honest smile. 

Words are lost - the only answer Hajime can give him is to kiss him again.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow the AU in its completion [here](http://amalasdraws.tumblr.com/tagged/war-au) or [here](http://josai.tumblr.com/tagged/war-au) for everything first before it hits AO3!
> 
> I have so many feelings!! Thank you for reading - please leave a comment and let me know what you thought! I'd love to write more, and we have so much story planned out for this AU! Why do we love pain so much? Big thanks to Amalas for beta reading this and encouraging me as I ~~flail around a lot~~ write  <3


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